Embracing Minimalism in 2016

MINIMALISM, also known as abstract expressionism, was an American-born dominant art movement in the 1960’s. Minimalists reduced their work to the smallest number of colors, values, shapes, lines, and textures. The artists wanted their audience to appreciate their work without the distractions of traditional elements of art. They just aimed to create objects with presence, something that can be seen at its basic physical appearance and experienced at face value.

DONALD JUDD, 'Daybed', 1979

Agnes Martin, 'Untitled', 1959 (Des Moines Art Center, Iowa)

A Robert Morris sculpture

Anne Truitt "First" 1961, Latex on wood
(The Baltimore Art: Gift of the Artist, Washington, DC)

Minimalism and Christianity

"What minimalism is really all about," wrote blogger Colin Wright in Exile Lifestyle, "is reassessment of your priorities so that you can strip away the excess stuff – the possessions and ideas and relationships and activities – that don’t bring value to your life."

Honestly, that is not an original idea. Around 2,000 years ago, Jesus counselled a rich young ruler and said, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”

I am not advocating minimalism because it is a trend, or because a famous celebrity promoted it. I became a minimalist neither on purpose nor by accident. I believe it is all part of God’s plan to teach me humility and contentment among many other things. My role model is the Lord Jesus Christ, who did not coin the term minimalism, but lived a life that must serve as a general guide for the conduct of all Christians.  Jesus did not come from a wealthy family, he was born on a stable. He did not go to an Ivy League school, but he had astounding wisdom. He was prayerful, compassionate, gentle and sincere, and he never worshiped money or power. That is the kind of person I want to be.

Materialism vs. Minimalism

The Prince of Preachers, Charles Spurgeon, was a strong proponent of the Bible as his sole authority in preaching and practice. He said, “You say, ‘If I had a little more, I should be very satisfied.’ You make a mistake. If you are not content with what you have, you would not be satisfied if it were doubled.”

The Christmas season is an opportunity for some people to acquire and hoard stuff, even stuff they don’t really need. In my case, it is always an opportunity to give away unwanted gifts that other people might find beautiful or useful, and to share our blessings. Seriously, I have only bought and used two pairs of shoes this year. I can live with just one backpack and one other bag for special occasions when I am required to wear a dress. I don’t collect bags, shoes, or accessories and a bunch of other useless stuff.

My red Jansport backpack was a present from my brother a few years back. I use it for work, for mountaineering, for graduate school, etc. The bag on the right was given by my sister-in-law six months ago and I have not once used it. I will carry it for the first time this weekend as we will attend a birthday party.

Minimalism in Social Media

I am still guilty of oversharing quotes from Pinterest to Instagram, but I have recently succeeded in cleaning up my Facebook timeline as a silent declaration of minimalism. I used to be addicted to Facebook in such a way that I posted even the most mundane things just to seek people’s attention and eradicate my boredom. In reality, I admire people who don’t often post pictures of everything they eat, think or do. I had a pupil who would always tell me they went to Star City or Kidzania or to someplace fancy, but I wouldn’t see any pictures on Facebook. When I asked his mommy why she did not post pictures, she told me it wasn’t necessary. As a famous Hollywood actor said, “I don’t like to share my personal life. It wouldn’t be personal if I shared it.”

This coming year, I resolve to spend less time on social media and accomplish my unfinished 2015 reading list instead. I will definitely cherish my privacy and eliminate distractions.

I am happy to have zero clutter on my Facebook timeline.

Minimalist Appetite for Food

I wrote a two-part series entitled It Starts with Food: Getting Educated on Weight Loss that you can read here and here, but believe it or not: I gained back three kilos recently due to stress.

Sometimes, our old passions war against us and it is particularly difficult to eat clean during the holidays. Nevertheless, I have kept in mind the right kinds of food to eat, and I plan to carry on improving my eating habits in 2016.

65 kgs. in September 2014 (left) down to 50 kgs. in November 2015 (right)

Minimalist Attitude and Behavior

In 2016, my minimalist mantra will be: quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry (James 1:19). I will try to be more mindful rather than emotional, remembering the words of Dr. Ross W. Greene, an American clinical child psychologist: 

Separation of affect refers to the ability to separate the emotions (affect) you’re feeling in response to a problem or frustration from the thinking you must do to solve the problem. While emotions can be quite useful for mobilizing or energizing people to solve problems, THINKING is how problems get solved. Kids (or adults) skilled at separating affect tend to respond to problems or frustrations with more thought than emotion, and that’s good. But kids (or adults) who lack skills in this domain tend to respond to problems or frustrations with more emotion and less (or no) thought, and that’s not good at all. Learning how to put your emotions “on the shelf” so as to be able to think rationally is an essential developmental skill, and one many challenging kids have failed to develop.

Finally, here are at least eight benefits of minimalism that I have gleaned from my personal experiences. Minimalism helps us to:

• Discover our purpose in life
• Set our goals and priorities
• Live in the moment
• Cultivate contentment
• Practice temperance
• Focus on our health and wellness
• Get rid of useless stuff
• Experience real freedom

Happy holidays! To God be the glory! 

Life is Short, Less is More

More Quality Time

After climbing Mt. Manabu last weekend, I spent a day or two meditating on self-refinement, concept mapping my priorities and catching up on my Bible-reading. I am convinced that I have wasted too much time in my 20’s and I am now doing my best to sharpen my affections for God and spend the rest of my days in purposeful living – calling to mind the words of the apostle Paul: 

See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, 
Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.
Wherefore be ye not unwise,
but understanding what the will of the Lord is.
(Ephesians 5:15-17)

Reiterating the words of a Forbes contributor, “I’m on a mission to simplify life, to slow it down to a pace at which it can actually be consumed, not just tasted.  I don’t want to hide behind the ubiquitous, “I’m really busy” as a badge of honor.  I want a lower cost of living (not just financially) and a higher quality of life.  I want to limit the number of things that compete for my attention so that I can apply more attention to those things I care the most about.”

Certainly, less is more. Here’s what my mind map looks like at the moment:

Created using https://bubbl.us/mindmap

If it weren’t for my family and friends that I communicate with regularly through Messenger, I would have already deleted my Facebook account as I no longer find purpose in using it. Nevertheless, I spent a couple of days cleaning up my timeline, realizing that social media has ridiculously sucked time from my life even if I had somehow succeeded in increasing my self-control over the past year. I have observed that it brings out the worst in other people (even myself), and I am resolving to live a quiet life, minding my own business from now on. I just want to spend time on things that interest me (such as creative stimulation) as well as things that I think are important to be preserved, like family bonding time. Instead of superficial online interactions, I would rather have more meaningful, face-to-face connections. 

2,000 years ago, Roman philosopher Seneca wrote these wise words in On The Shortness of Life:

It is not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste a lot of it. Life is long enough, and a sufficiently generous amount has been given to us for the highest achievements if it were all well invested. But when it is wasted in heedless luxury and spent on no good activity, we are forced at last by death’s final constraint to realize that it has passed away before we knew it was passing. So it is: we are not given a short life but we make it short, and we are not ill-supplied but wasteful of it… Life is long if you know how to use it.

You are living as if destined to live forever; your own frailty never occurs to you; you don’t notice how much time has already passed, but squander it as though you had a full and overflowing supply — though all the while that very day which you are devoting to somebody or something may be your last. You act like mortals in all that you fear, and like immortals in all that you desire… How late it is to begin really to live just when life must end! How stupid to forget our mortality, and put off sensible plans to our fiftieth and sixtieth years, aiming to begin life from a point at which few have arrived!

Putting things off is the biggest waste of life: it snatches away each day as it comes, and denies us the present by promising the future. The greatest obstacle to living is expectancy, which hangs upon tomorrow and loses today. You are arranging what lies in Fortune’s control, and abandoning what lies in yours. What are you looking at? To what goal are you straining? The whole future lies in uncertainty: live immediately.

Mountaineering: An Art of Noticing, Living with Presence and Strengthening Family Ties

Memories in the Mountain

“I am losing precious days. I am degenerating into a machine for making money. I am learning nothing in this trivial world of men. I must break away and get out into the mountains to learn the news,” wrote Scottish-American naturalist and author John Muir a decade before we existed in a world where majority of us are invariably looking down on our smartphones, bonding with our virtual friends over social media instead of trying to have a meaningful conversation with the people sitting right next to us – our family.

Out of curiosity and after the incessant prodding of common friends, my husband and I first climbed a mountain in 2007. We did not take it seriously, for we stayed up all night prior to the trip - thinking that it would just be a simple hike and no special kind of preparation would be necessary – but, until now I can still remember how exhausted I was when we reached the summit of Mt. Daguldol where we camped to relax and just enjoy the night.

My husband and I had to do the obligatory jumpshot with out friends at the summit of Mt. Daguldol, several years before the invention of the ‘selfie stick.’

Unfortunately, after giving birth to our son, the following years were spent working, raising a family, building a home – all inherently good things – but as what John Muir said, we felt like we were losing precious days. We ached for moments to just enjoy each other’s presence without getting distracted by our problems and fears. We missed the beauty and quietness of nature, and vowed that as soon as our son was ready for an adventure, we would take him to the mountains.

Small Family, Big Adventure

Finally, when our son Basti turned six, we decided to go on a dayhike as a family. We had no idea where to go and being typical device-distracted parents, we knew how to turn to Google for some answers. I typed in the keywords, “dayhike for children near Manila,” and the first among the 900,000+ results that came up was the blogsite Pinoy Mountaineer – brainchild of medical doctor and anthropologist Gideon Lasco.

On October 27, 2013, we embarked on our first family mountain-climbing exploration in Mt. Batulao, Nasugbu, Batangas. Pinoy Mountaineer was very helpful in terms of creating an itinerary, preparing for your budget and transportation, and taking a sneak peek of the mountain by looking at the pictures. It has become a habit for us to refer to this website even as we climbed Pico De Loro and Mt. Maculot within the last couple of years.

“Play is often talked about as if it were a relief from serious learning. But for children play is serious learning. Play is really the work of childhood.” – Fred Rogers

Although he was probably too young to remember the details of this entire trip,

Basti was quite proud of himself for reaching the summit of Mt. Batulao in 2013.

This picture was taken near the campsite of Pico De Loro on December 23, 2013. We did not climb all the way to the summit because we were worried that it might rain as it did in the beginning of our ascent.

May 11, 2014. Again, we decided not to climb the summit of Mt. Maculot because it rained so hard at the campsite where we got stuck with other hikers for at least an hour. Nevertheless, we proceeded to the top of The Rockies and marveled at the beauty of Taal Lake as seen in the background.

Pinoy Mountaineer Climbs with Kids

Basti recently turned 8 years old and it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas, but we haven’t been to any mountain this year; we terribly miss hiking. I was ecstatic when I saw Pinoy Mountaineer’s Facebook post about his plans of climbing with kids, so within a few minutes after seeing the status, I e-mailed Gideon Lasco to express our interest to join this beginner’s dayhike and he immediately replied that Basti made it to the list. The process went smoothly, we communicated through text with the help of fellow mountaineers Brenton Tan and Pam Aquino, and met up at EDSA Buendia at exactly 5:30 AM on October 24, 2015.

Together with three other families and our children, a van brought us to Mt. Manabu in Lipa, Batangas at around 8:30 in the morning. Before our hike, Gideon Lasco started with a short briefing and gave an inspirational talk to further inspire and motivate us families who, despite having some mountaineering experience, felt humbled by the presence of such a down-to-earth leader who has climbed mountains all over the world, yet took the time to mentor our children.

There was a question and answer portion. Gideon asked the children, “Do you know what MANABU means? (It’s Mataas na Bundok),” and “Is the spider an insect? (No, it’s an arachnid).” He also encouraged the children to think of an adjective with the same first letter as their name. From left: Gutsy Gab, Brave Basti, Gideon (the Genius), Jolly Jamie and Likable Lyka.

Here are at least five key takeaways from Pinoy Mountaineer’s short but meaningful orientation:

• Always be prepared before each climb. Get the recommended eight hours of sleep and make sure you are well-rested before hiking to increase your endurance.
• Have a list of things to bring. Even if you are just planning to do a dayhike, remember to bring a flashlight or headlamp in case of emergencies. Make sure you have enough trail food as well to keep you energized while hiking.
• Be open to nature. Just be happy and enjoy the activity. There are many interesting things to see. For example, we will find sampinit along the way. They are the rarest wild raspberries of the Philippines and they can be eaten. Gideon said that we would also find a big cross at the summit and at this point, the children simply could not contain their excitement.
• Keep the mountains clean. He modelled the way for us as he held open a plastic bag on our way down from the summit. He picked up litter and the children imitated him cheerfully. He said that if we take care of the mountain, it will also take care of us.
• Don’t get out of the trail. It is easy to get lost in the mountains if you don’t follow the trail. There are dangers that can be avoided if you simply walk closely with the group.

“A mountaineer is always prepared,” Gideon said as he stood in front of the group to lead the warm up exercises. “Our bodies must be well-stretched to avoid cramps,” he added. Eventually, he ended the morning briefing with a prayer. “Of course, above all things we must be prepared spiritually,” he concluded. As a Christian family, we appreciated this act of reverence for God - whose majesty is evidenced by the grandeur of the mountains and whose glory is declared by the skies – calling to mind that our Lord Jesus Christ was quite fond of the mountains when He was living among his people, as he had a habit of spending his solitude in prayer and reflection.

One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God. (Luke 6:12)

Another fun and fantastic learning activity that our children enjoyed was tree-planting somewhere in the middle of Mt. Manabu. We were all sweating profusely as our guide Brent stopped to dig some holes where the children could plant the seedlings that we got from the jump off.

I could not believe that we were able to accomplish so much in so little time: tree-planting, picture-taking, getting to know one another and strengthening family ties. Manabu Peak truly was the perfect spot for the first ever Pinoy Mountaineer Climbs with Kids, as it was a short yet challenging hike for all children and adults. “Thousands of tired, nerve-shaken, over-civilized people are beginning to find out that going to the mountains is going home; that wildness is a necessity,” wrote John Muir in Our National Parks.

Mountaineering is a magnificent experience for families who want to learn the art of noticing in their daily lives, to escape the noise and distractions of the concrete jungle. From constantly keeping an eye on your children lest they stumble along the way, to taking photos of unusual creatures that you will only find in these secret places – mountaineering allows you to live with mindful presence and the innocent playfulness of a child. It lets us lose track of time without guilt or the pervasive disease of our culture called FOMO or the fear of missing out, and permits us to let go of our anxieties even for one day as we feel small and humbled by this vast, natural elevation. As Paulo Coelho said, “You don’t need to climb a mountain to know that it’s high.”

  

“Everybody should be quiet near a little stream and listen.”
– Maurice Sendak

The Cordero Family at the summit of Mt. Manabu, with our mountaineering mentor and inspiration, Gideon Lasco. (Basti was getting tired and hungry, and was trying his best to smile for the photo-op).

We were glad to taste some of Mang Tino’s free civet coffee at Station 5. Civet coffee, refers to the coffee that includes part-digested coffee cherries eaten and defecated by the Asian palm civet (Paradoxurus hermaphroditus). Source: Wikipedia

An Art of Noticing. Gideon saw some spiders and encouraged the children to slow down and appreciate the unique creatures that they would find along the way. He explained that we did not have to hurry as we were not pressed for time. He was also holding a plastic bag to pick up some trash – proof of his genuine advocacy and love for the mountains.

Also a terrific storyteller, Gideon shared many interesting stories from his most remarkable climbs which he had all committed to his memory. Among our favorites are the tales of the talking bamboo, the magic shirt, the limatik that came out of his eye, his life-threatening encounter with a raging river, and many others that could fill up an entire book. He also showed us some videos of his climbs with celebrities and his most recent trip to the Swiss Alps.

As a novice mountaineer, a mother and a preschool teacher, I highly encourage friends and families to get outdoors and see the glorious mountains. I guarantee it’s the perfect chance to take a breather from our productivity-obsessed lifestyle, to walk with our children for the simple joy of being with one another. We live in a fast-paced society. Hiking or mountaineering helps us to slow down and think clearly. Let us spend time playing and exploring with our children while we can, for these are the memories that are built to last a lifetime.

Thank you very much, Mr. Gideon Lasco, for an amazing experience. It was a privilege to hike with and learn from an expert mountaineer like you. Looking forward to our next climb!

This essay was also published in Pinoy Mountaineer as The joys and blessings of hiking with my family by Raquel Cordero.

Pray Without Ceasing and Keep Writing

“Writing intrinsically champions and improves creativity, critical thinking, and clarity. It helps us not only gain new ideas, but also articulates them. It untangles the messiness in our lives and allows for clearer thinking,” wrote Paul Jun on 99u.com.

I was about eleven years old when I discovered the benefits of keeping a diary, and it brought me simple joys at a young age: enjoying my solitude and polishing my English. To me it was sort of a discipline for my laziness and lack of observation.  Sadly, I burned most of my journals during my chaotic twenties due to uncontrolled emotions, but it never stopped me from writing as I know how to follow my passions. Times have changed, and while I still have some notebooks for occasional handwriting, I am quite fond of using Evernote for online note-taking, especially during my morning devotions when I am usually pressed for time.

Daily Devotions

“In the diary I only wrote of what interested me genuinely, what I felt most strongly at the moment,” spoke Anais Nin in a 1946 lecture. Every morning, I make it a habit to set aside the first thirty to sixty minutes of my day in reading the Word of God – what interests me genuinely - and write a short note about my thoughts and emotions at that moment. Furthermore, I pray for spiritual and physical strength as I spend this time with my sovereign God. I constantly remind myself that God is gracious, loving and merciful, then I am ready to seize the day.

A Recollection of Feelings

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7) 

I love reading my previous entries in Evernote - admitting my total dependence on God - and realizing that He has not once failed to comfort and sustain me.

Sharing some of my most recent, honest, unpublishable journal entries (that nobody reads, nobody but me) makes me feel blessed.

August 1: Seeking God

I want to seek God first. I want to set aside the first 60 minutes of my life worshipping God and reading His word. I want to have a rock solid routine when it comes to this holy hour as I truly believe that God is most important in my life. It is God first and then family and relationships and then work and then everything else. For this to happen, I have to give God my undivided attention. It is not easy but it can be done. As John Piper says, “The great promise to those who seek the Lord is that He will be found.”

August 3: Who is God?

Who is God? How can I draw strength from God? It’s the first day of the new school year and I want to have God always by my side.

August 6: Still Standing

I wasn’t able to pray because it rained around 2am and we had to wake up to gather the laundry. I have been very tired this week. It is only by God’s grace that I am still standing.

August 11: Prayerlessness

Dear God, I am having a hard time praying today. I feel that my anxiety is distracting me from you. Help me focus on you, Lord Jesus, and not on our problems. Teach me to trust in you with all of my heart and lean not on my own understanding. I cannot fix my broken self but you absolutely can. Thank you for this assurance as I believe in your promises.

August 13: Casting my Burdens to Jesus

Here are the things that stress me out right now:

• My MA classes and the requirements that I haven’t even begun to do
• The situation in school where my pupils are struggling in handwriting, reading and behaving well
• Our financial problems, debts, and our current situation in the Philippines as we are not so sure if we could ever migrate to New Zealand
• The archery club that needs more equipment and funds to run it in the Orchard
• Basti’s education in general as he might be struggling in IBA as well

August 14: Humility vs. Anxiety

I am sorry God for my false modesty which I thought was already humility. I am sorry for saying bad things about others instead of encouraging them. I complain about certain people and things because I feel entitled to something. There is something wrong with my heart as I cleverly try to cover up the pain of being a nobody, of being poor and ignored. Secretly, I want attention and approval which I thought I didn’t mind (being unnoticed), but like I said, it is just false modesty. I don’t want to hide these things from you, Lord. Thank you for making me aware and I pray you will bridle my tongue and help me be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry by casting all my anxiety on you, Lord Jesus.

August 17: There’s Something Wrong with Me

I think there’s something wrong with me when it comes to friendships and relationships because of my impatience. I get so impatient with people and I am okay with being by myself which I know is wrong because that would mean having no one to share the gospel to and not being salt and light to the world. Lord Jesus, please heal my impatience and take away my apathy. Help me to be more understanding and considerate of people, especially my friends. Give me a chance to share your love to everybody without choosing the ones I would hang out with. Thank you.

August 30: Symptoms of Pride

• Fault-finding
• Ministering in a harsh spirit
• Putting on pretense
• Taking offense easily
• Presumption before God and man
• Hungry for attention
• Neglecting others 

September 4: My Faith is Being Attacked

Satan eats faith for breakfast. I feel like I am being under attack again because at this point, I am so angry! I know as a Christian this is wrong thinking. It’s not Christ-exalting. It will be my birthday in two weeks. 

Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or a sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. (1 John 4:20)

September 5: God Restores

Yesterday, I woke up so upset and so stressed at work that I ended up eating burger and fries at McDonald’s after class. I ate so irresponsibly yesterday. For the last two days, I was eating junk. I knew I was stress-eating and it was happening more frequently. Last night I shouted at Basti because he wouldn’t brush his teeth and he burst out crying so I had to say sorry. Lesson learned? Fast and pray instead of eating junk. I haven’t tried it but it could be the best solution. And don’t shout at my pupils or to anybody for that matter. Thanks be to God who restores hope and refreshes me in the morning!

September 8: Speak Life and Break Curses

Rumor has it that there is a curse inside my classroom because all the pupils who stay in it become uncontrollable. I refuse to believe it at first but now that my pupils are starting to misbehave, I realize that I must speak life to them every day. I realize that even to myself, I have been saying negative words, such as “I am stressed,” or “I am getting fat.” This should not be the case for death and life are in the power of the tongue! Every day I must speak blessings even to others. I must be in control for greater is HE who is in me than he who is in the world.

September 17: Like a Nightmare

Today is like waking up from a nightmare. We just received some bad news. Right in front of our eyes is naked greed in action. Some people don’t have compassion for the poor. [This person] is ungrateful, wicked and has no mercy. I pray that he would find the Lord even if what I really want to do right now is to destroy his reputation and take this matter into our own hands. But my husband and I decided to just let it go and trust God to work things out for our good. May God give us peace and increase our faith in the midst of this storm. 

Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. (Romans 12:19-21) 

September 20: A Great Lesson on Humility

What a shame for us! What a shame to accuse someone! We could have simply asked him first it was true. Rather we accused him and allowed our emotions to rule our heads. What we did was so shameful, yet it is real that “God will never let the righteous be put into shame.” We praise the Lord even more for touching this person’s heart that he even offered to help my husband in this matter. He could have been angry and he could have rejected us completely. Oh, what an amazing God we have!

This is such a great lesson about humility and not judging people, and trusting God’s word. There are many Bible verses about praying for what we need, not being anxious, God supplying our needs, and not judging people. There are so many lessons in this one event in our life. I am glad we went to church that night and sought refuge in the Lord instead of doing an evil thing like taking it out on social media. As the person said, “Please verify this information.” And we should always consult the Lord. Praise God for leading us in our life, for guiding us in what we do, for seeking His will and taking refuge in Him – our ROCK OF REFUGE! God is worthy to be praised!

A Grateful Heart

Writing this post has also reminded me that many years ago, I learned to stop praying for material things, conquering unhealthy obsessions and believing that the desires of my heart have already been fashioned by God himself. It is amazing how I no longer worry about what we will eat or what we will wear, for God knows our needs even before we ask. God has indeed transformed me by the renewing of my mind. He is truly more than enough for me.

I am overflowing with gratitude to God for the gift of prayer and the gift of writing in my life. Their significance strongly resonates with me. I encourage you to pray while writing, or write while praying. These habits can do more for your soul than you can ever imagine.

God Will Give You Rest

Imagine that you are a call center supervisor who has the potential to be promoted as the next operations manager. You work longer hours to meet deadlines, attend high profile meetings, finish your deliverables and still manage to hang out with your subordinates after shift to “build relationships” and make sure their performance remains excellent. You only get 4-5 hours of sleep per day, that is if you’re not busy running errands during your “free time.”

Or maybe you’re a preschool teacher, like me, who takes care of very young children in school – teaching them how to read and write, while integrating all these activities with arts and physical education. You sometimes bring home test papers so you can finish checking them and complete their report cards. On Saturdays, you attend graduate school and other professional development seminars, submitting a ton of requirements to get good grades and earn that elusive master’s degree. To top it all off, you have your own children to raise and a husband to serve. When you get home every night, you must help the children with their homework, and make sure they are enrolled in weekend sports activities, music lessons or acting classes. You are a working mother – a successful career woman – who also has civic and social responsibilities plus a large circle of friends. You even have time to go to the gym to lose weight or to inspire others to get fit and live an active lifestyle.

Or perhaps, you’re starting a small business and managing a few employees. Your children are in college where you pay exorbitant amounts for their tuition, in addition to your home mortgage and car loans. You have credit card debts that are blown up because of hospital bills and unnecessary purchases. You sometimes also work at home and during the weekends, that is if it’s not the schedule to take your wife and children to a grand vacation or another shopping spree. You know you’d rather be saving up for your quickly depleting emergency fund, but all your friends post pictures of their frequent out-of-the-country trips and you don’t want to be called a loser.

Whoever you are, wherever you live, you must be under a lot of pressure to succeed, to exceed expectations, to be rich and popular, to be a wonderful parent and a cool friend, to be interesting and intelligent, to stay relevant and opinionated. You have 1,001 items in your bucket list and you’re quite sure you can tick them all off before your 40^th birthday.

There are days when you get really tired. You get stressed and sick, feeling drained. You wonder why the expensive vitamins and food supplements are just not that effective. You get overwhelmed with your busy schedule and the attention that your loved ones demand. If you were in Colorado, at the end of the day you could smoke marijuana legally to help with your insomnia and day-to-day anxiety. If you lived in a cramped city like Tokyo, you could drop by a cat café after work to sip delicious coffee while petting a cute kitty. Here in the Philippines, you could simply go to a bar after office hours to get drunk and smoke cigarettes that are guaranteed to help you relax. The next day, you wake up with a massive headache, but you just have to deal with that stress someway, somehow.

Most of us fall prey to the cult of productivity at different times in our lives. There’s just too much pressure at work, in our families, in our society. Working hard and fulfilling responsibilities are innately good things, except when they get out of hand, when they take over what is truly important. We may be under a lot of pressure to excel in everything we do because conventional wisdom dictates that we only live once, hence we must live life to the fullest.

One of the reasons could be envy or covetousness – the desire to have other people’s qualities or possessions. It may also be pride or self-conceit – the desire to be better than others. It seems like each person is in competition with everyone else.

In The Fountainhead, Ayn Rand writes: 

“Listen to what is being preached today. Look at everyone around us. You've wondered why they suffer, why they seek happiness and never find it. If any man stopped and asked himself whether he's ever held a truly personal desire, he'd find the answer. He'd see that all his wishes, his efforts, his dreams, his ambitions are motivated by other men. He's not really struggling even for material wealth, but for the second-hander's delusion - prestige. A stamp of approval, not his own. He can find no joy in the struggle and no joy when he has succeeded. He can't say about a single thing: 'This is what I wanted because I wanted it, not because it made my neighbors gape at me'. Then he wonders why he's unhappy.” 

It will be a never-ending cycle, unless we give up the struggle. But what if there’s no way to stop? We must continue to work because we have bills to pay and a family to feed; there is nothing wrong with that. However, we need to have priorities and give up the things that weigh us down. Life is short and the older you get, the more you feel it.

If you believe in God, you do believe that life is full of suffering but we have a God that comforts and strengthens us.

If you don’t believe in God, the bad news is that you will always be exhausted and deceived. You will experience the wear and tear of life because that is normal. A religious woman once asked a male atheist friend how he coped with the death of his father the previous year, because her father had also just died a week ago. She wrote, “He's dead and in the ground. I take great comfort in thinking that he's in a good place. Do we just become fertilizer, end of story? I am not questioning your beliefs and the why or where of it. I'm just asking what you think is the next step. If you think it's fertilizer, please lie to make it more interesting.”

Someday, you will stop working and retire. Your children will grow up and have families of their own. Your spouse will die, or you will die first. “When two people marry, each one has to accept that one of them will die before the other,” wrote C.S. Lewis in A Grief Observed.

Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)

How exactly does that work? I can think of at least three ways:

• You stop being self-centered. You stop talking about yourself, stop promoting yourself, stop bragging about yourself and your accomplishments. You stop telling people you have a lot of money and can buy anything. You stop feeling like a celebrity when you get one hundred likes on every one of your Facebook statuses. You stop pretending that your life is always perfect, or that your children are flawless, or that your spouse is amazing. Now, I am going to say this with a lot of love: you are not the center of the universe. You stop the unnecessary self-glorification because God will give you the grace and humility to see the wonder of his sovereign love.

•  You start to have a clear, definite purpose in life: to glorify God. And by the way, you have to go to a genuine Christ-exalting church and read the Bible thoroughly to discover how loving, gentle and merciful God is. You have to understand that God is holy and that He knit you in your mother’s womb. You have to really believe that you are special in God’s eyes and everything He does is for your good, whether you like it or not. In his bestselling book, The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here for? Rick Warren explains it beautifully:

“If not to God, you will surrender to the opinions or expectations of others, to money, to resentment, to fear, or to your own pride, lusts, or ego. You were designed to worship God and if you fail to worship Him, you will create other things (idols) to give your life to. You weren't put on earth to be remembered. You were put here to prepare for eternity."

• Finally, you walk by faith, not by sight. You begin to put your faith in God. You have daily needs? God provides. Is your child sick? God heals. Is your family broken? God restores relationships. Did you lose your job? God can replace what you’ve lost. Are you emotionally wounded? God is close to the brokenhearted. You no longer worry too much because someone above you is going to help you and take care of your needs. Each time He says, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in [your] weakness." 

Now, what happens next? Well, you continue to work, to take care of your family, to pursue your hobbies, to reach those goals in life – but this time, with a quiet confidence that through good and bad times, God is with you. You will never feel alone again. The pressure will be lifted. The stress will be eliminated.

Know that Jesus Christ is the only way to God. The first step is to trust Him because you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. I believe it is the best decision you can make in life, and if you would like to take a rest from all your problems, fears and distractions, come to Jesus now and pray this short prayer with me: 

Lord Jesus, I am very tired and weary. Today, I make the decision to trust you and believe that you can set me free from all things that bring me down. Please touch my heart and change the direction of my life so that I no longer have to be exhausted and worried again. I put my faith that you are the only way to God and that you truly care for me. Please give me rest from all my anxieties. Thank you very much for loving me. Amen.

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As I celebrate my 34th birthday, I would love to remember and savor God's faithfulness in my life. I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust." (Psalm 91:2)

Basti and I had lunch with my parents at Savory - The District Imus.
A father’s goodness is higher than the mountain,
a mother’s goodness deeper than the sea. - Japanese Proverb

While waiting for Daddy Marvin in SM Southmall, Basti and I took some selfies and I noticed the wrinkles around my eyes. Yes, I know I am old. Here's a good Mark Twain quote to remember: "Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been."

We had an early dinner in Sambokojin, SM Southmall where you can dine for free if it's your birthday, and as Maya Angelou said,
“I sustain myself with the love of family.”

Celebrating 34 years of God's grace and mercy: To God be the glory!